Comedian Quotes

I've never understood what the upside of marriage would be for me personally.

I love being in a relationship, but marriage isn't for me.

I knew going in that being a single parent would be one of the toughest jobs I'd ever have. I'd been a talk-show host, actor, comic, and on and on, but this gig was going to be my defining moment.

At one point in my career, while still hosting 'The Arsenio Hall Show,' I was told by my doctor that it might not be physically possible for me to have children.

I don't possess a lot of self-confidence. I'm an actor so I simply act confident every time I hit the stage.

I am consumed with the fear of failing. Reaching deep down and finding confidence has made all my dreams come true.

I know I did the right thing by taking time off to raise my son. But it also came at a price. I turned down many opportunities over the years because I didn't want to leave him for long periods of time. And in Hollywood, as in any business, the calls stop coming when you don't answer.

Golf is more fun than walking naked in a strange place, but not much.

I've had a good day when I don't fall out of the cart.

I've had a few arguments with people, but I never carry a grudge. You know why? While you're carrying a grudge, they're out dancing.

As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

There are no black people in Iraq, so how will they know who to shoot at?

Why do we need another station where everyone has a gun? We already have BET.

You know, once somebody knows you can sing Elphaba, it's like being able to sing Evita - people shut up about it already.

Losing yourself in the character opens you up in a way that no amount of precise preparation can.

It's so easy in these cabaret venues to get earnest.

It's funny, there are so many women who are former executives and have taken all that stress and anxiety and transferred it onto their kids.

It's definitely like being in some weird sorority. I'm friends with a lot of actresses, but my 'SNL' friends are my closest.

I've always lived in a city. I'm very social, and in a place like New York, even if you're alone on the subway, you never feel lonely.

I've always lived in a city.

I'm very social, and in a place like New York, even if you're alone on the subway, you never feel lonely.

I'm so bad at spontaneous impressions.

I'm pretty earthy; I nursed forever because I liked it and my kids liked it, but at the same time I'm very laissez-faire about stuff like bedtimes and food.

I'm not much of a famous-person friend. I've hung out with Brooke Shields and I don't think I've ever seen that kind of pure face recognition, but I keep a low profile.

I'm not a standup, but I play one on TV.

I'm friends with a lot of actresses, but my 'SNL' friends are my closest. The experience of working there is something of a battleground, a great one, but complicated. I think there's a deep connection for having survived that workplace.

I'd like to say that parody is a celebration of a person's specific characteristics, as opposed to mockery.

I was inspired more by early Bette Midler. I do wear a fancy dress and very high heels - and extra high hair. My goal is to obliterate all earnestness.

I played Liddy Dole last year and met her as well. From the artful way she phrased it, I still don't know if she had actually seen me play her. She made it sound like it was good, but that's just a gift they have.

I love people who try to keep the world in control - because the world is inherently not in control.