Cartoonist Quotes

The world is full of people looking for spectacular happiness while they snub contentment.

Accomplishing the impossible means only that the boss will add it to your regular duties.

Wisdom is the quality that keeps you from getting into situations where you need it.

Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush.

If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.

Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles.

Few things are more satisfying than seeing your children have teenagers of their own.

A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows.

Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible.

Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.

For disappearing acts, it's hard to beat what happens to the eight hours supposedly left after eight of sleep and eight of work.

Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you'd have preferred to talk.

A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success!

More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse.

The boredom occasioned by too much restraint is always preferable to that produced by an uncontrolled enthusiasm for a pointless variety.

So here we have pi squared, which an engineer would call 10.

No more turkey, but I'd like some more of the bread it ate.

Anyone in the humor business isn't thinking clearly if he doesn't surround himself with idea people. Otherwise, you settle for mediocrity - or you burn yourself out.

Flattery is like chewing gum. Enjoy it but don't swallow it.

Women aren't as mere as they used to be.

We have met the enemy and he is us.

In like a dimwit, out like a light.

Every burden is a blessing.

It is not good enough for things to be planned - they still have to be done; for the intention to become a reality, energy has to be launched into operation.

We are confronted with insurmountable opportunities.

When I was in high school at Northeast Catholic in Philadelphia in the late '30s, I found that drawing caricatures of the teachers and satirizing the events in the school, then having them published in our school magazine, got me some notoriety.

We are, in the comics, the last frontier of good, wholesome family humor and entertainment.

On radio and television, magazines and the movies, you can't tell what you're going to get. When you look at the comic page, you can usually depend on something acceptable by the entire family.

Many of the network television shows have done takeoffs on 'Family Circus,' including 'David Letterman,' 'Friends,' 'Roseanne,' and others, and, in my estimation the use of them is a compliment to the popularity of the feature, which just by mentioning it's name sets up the image of a warm, loving f