I think you have to know who you are. Get to know the monster that lives in your soul, dive deep into your soul and explore it.
That men should live honestly, quietly, and comfortably together, it is needful that they should live under a sense of God's will, and in awe of the divine power, hoping to please God, and fearing to offend Him, by their behaviour respectively.
It certainly must help us if we recognize that it is the presence of the Holy Spirit which creates a unity which we can never create.