I just did what I did and I still am. It makes you unpopular, maybe for a lifetime, but I'd rather do that than be popular and doubt what I am.
I don't recall having a gun. I really don't. I don't think I ever pulled a gun on anyone in my life.
We can only write well about our sins because it is too difficult to recall a virtuous act or even whether it was the result of good or evil motives.