I was a chronically shy child. That kernel of my younger self is still there, but I've developed mechanisms to deal with it.
I think essentially the meaning of life is probably the journey and not really any one thing or an outcome or a result. I think it's kinda the process and I think that if you can find happiness in the process then maybe that's it.
I was raised as a Christian but the transaction has to be made by yourself - you and God - at some point.