I guess I had a suspicion of it my entire life without knowing exactly what it was - knowing that there was something different about me, which I attributed to being an artist. At 11 or 12 I started sort of clarifying for myself. It took a while.
I wanted to make the album I always needed to make. I had to say the things I never could.
It's always hard - if you're not the best player on your team, how can you be the best player in college?