No matter what message you are about to deliver somewhere, whether it is holding out a hand of friendship, or making clear that you disapprove of something, is the fact that the person sitting across the table is a human being, so the goal is to always establish common ground.
“What could begin to deny self, if there were not something in man different from self?”
“We weep over the graves of infants and the little ones taken from us by death; but an early grave may be the shortest way to heaven.”