I used to think drinking was the only way to be happy. Now I know there is no way to be happy.
“I've been trying to watch my weight a bit, but when I come to Las Vegas, all bets are off. I get enough healthy food in L.A. where the food is the size of a quarter and costs $40 - when I'm in Vegas, I want a steak!”
“I was young not too long ago, and I know the last thing you want is someone preaching to you.”