There is no definitive guidebook on how to pick the right partner, and even if there were, I'm way too dumb to write it.
“I've leased the apartment; my partner is going to come out here. But we're keeping our house in Chicago because real estate is a really good investment and also because it is just crammed with full of stuff!”
“I'm still strongly opposed to antismoking laws, strongly opposed to any law that regulates personal behavior.”