There is no definitive guidebook on how to pick the right partner, and even if there were, I'm way too dumb to write it.
“I have been a big guy all my life, I am not going to lose a bunch of weight, because then you're like that weird fat person that got skinny but still has a big head. I don't want to do that. So I'm just trying.”
“If it pleases you and you can write at all, it's gonna please somebody else.”