You're just sort of searching for this 'thing' and sometimes you get it and sometimes you don't. All music is imperfect, but in jazz since you're improvising, at least the way I play, I'm trying to follow my train of thought in a solo.
“Our system provides for a winner to take office on January 20th, and he is expected to take command of the ship of state. Failure to do so, characterized by hesitation and indecision, will harm the national interest.”
“Generally I can sleep any time, anywhere, any place, unless I'm anxious about work. I can get performance anxiety, so when I'm on tour it can be hard to sleep.”