You're just sort of searching for this 'thing' and sometimes you get it and sometimes you don't. All music is imperfect, but in jazz since you're improvising, at least the way I play, I'm trying to follow my train of thought in a solo.
“In the final analysis, it is your decision to make, but it doesn't move as fast as I'd like it to move.”
“Just take your time - wave comes. Let the other guys go, catch another one.”