Colonialism deprives you of your self-esteem and to get it back you have to fight to redress the balance.
Observe which side resorts to the most vociferous name-calling and you are likely to have identified the side with the weaker argument and they know it.
A woman should say: 'Have I made him happy? Is he satisfied? Does he love me more than he loved me before? Is he likely to go to bed with another woman?' If he does, then it's the wife's fault because she is not trying to make him happy.