I have become down-hearted, I have become discouraged, I have become depressed. I'm just like you. I'm a human being and I have my problems.
When I consider what it was that moved me to join the Communist Party, I have to cast my mind back for more than a quarter of a century to try and ascertain what precisely my motives at that time were.
What is a historian, anyway? It is someone who uses facts to record the development of humanity.