As an actor, there's very little you can do if people don't want to see you. Just getting yourself into the room to audition is tough.
“I've been invited to appear on Letterman, but they wanted me to talk about a funny videotape of Congress. 'Bring us your outtakes!' That's not our job.”
“Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake.”