Yes, sir. I'm a real Southern boy. I got a red neck, white socks, and Blue Ribbon beer.
I used to have a pony but I outgrew it and I do dream that one day I will live in the country and have lots of horses and be like a proper English lady who goes hunting and everything.
May I make a suggestion, hoping it is not an impertinence? Write it down: write down what you feel. It is sometimes a wonderful help in misery.