We all have idols. Play like anyone you care about but try to be yourself while you're doing so.
You can have immediate regrets, but if you look at stuff and say, 'Things happen for a reason', there's a fatalistic thing about it. Something will happen that will justify it in some way.
Baseball is a red-blooded sport for red-blooded men. It's no pink tea, and mollycoddles had better stay out.