There's never going to be a decathlon that you're going to have 10 events that your satisfied with. You're always, always going to be dissatisfied in something, and that always draws you back to try to retry that the next time you do a decathlon. It's like you go for the perfect 10.
“Consciousness is an end in itself. We torture ourselves getting somewhere, and when we get there it is nowhere, for there is nowhere to get to.”