Death is the last enemy: once we've got past that I think everything will be alright.
I was preparing myself for the theater, and... I got a little job here and a job there, but it wasn't going well, and I considered some time before the mid-60s that maybe I should consider something else.
It's like why people read scary books or go see scary movies. Because it creates a distance. They're scared, but they're not going to get hurt.